Do You Ever Feel Like Everyone Else Has It Together and You Don’t?
I think its the one question that every mom has been asked at some point. Its one of the most redundant questions someone could ever ask me. The truth? No one has it all together, but that doesn’t make us feeling any better does it? As humans, especially women, many times we strive for perfection. We strive, almost need perfection in our lives. From personal pressures, to societal ones we feel the need to have it all together, all the time. Its so easy to get down on yourself, because you can finish everything on your to-do list that day or have dinner on the table at 6 P.M. every evening.
I blame it on t.v., okay no I don’t, but the media has done a good job of presenting examples of women or people who “have it all together”. We see celebrities everyday who appear to live such perfect and luxurious life. Especially the Kim Kardashians of the media machine, that make it look so easy. Celebrities appear to have it all, but even they’ll tell you that they don’t. Despite the money and the fame, the same problems exist with them as it does us. The same for your neighbor down the street, with the landscaped yard amd seemingly perfectly behaved children. I can bet you, somewhere, some time along the way that same neighbor has doing a face palm, just like that celebrity.
Its easy to put on a good face, but its better to have a good and healthy mindset when it comes to dealing with pressure. Here’s some tips on how you can stop sweating the small stuff and staying motivated:
1. Realize that you are HUMAN. There are only 24 hours in a day, you can’t everything done. On days when you do, give yourself a pat on the back, and I don’t mean this sarcastically. Relish in the fact that you were able to manage your time wisely, got help, or was able to be Wonder Woman or Super Mom that day. You deserve it! Some times those days come few and far between.
2. Relax. Take time out for yourself. This is especially important, because we all need R & R and time to reboot. If you don’t learn to relax, you will be at in a constant heightend state that is unhealthy for both the mind and body. Mediate, pray, or just go and watch a sunrise or sunset. Do something that allows you to quiet your mind and clear your head.
3. Keep it simple. Take things one step at a time. Its when we try to do everything at once, that we get overwhelmed. Once we’re overwhelmed, our level of productivity and efficiency drops majorly. Making a list, doing one thing at a time, and planning ahead can help to combat getting overwhelmed. When you complete one thing, move on to the next, however take the time to recognize that you’ve accomplished that one thing on your list. Let it serve as your motivation to move forward.
4. Talk it out. Don’t hold things in when they bother you. It can have detrimental effects on your relationships with others, especially a spouse. Communication is key when it comes to a healthy relationship. By talking things out you will be able to get things off your chest, get support, and hear a different take on whatever situation may be at hand.
5. Be honest. Don’t make committments that you know you won’t be able to follow through on. If some asks you to do something, and you are not sure you will be able to do it, tell them you will get back to them. Do no immediately committ to anything, because if you do, that person will be expecting for you to follow through. To caveat, do follow up with them and let them know as to if you will or will not be able to do what it is they asked of you. I can’t stress enough that before you commit, do take a good long look at your schedule, lifestyle, and what all you have going on. Its not about making someone else happy at the sacrifice of your own happiness. Sometimes this even applies to our spouses and children.
6. Organize. Its the backbone of it all at the end of the day and the hardest many times. As mothers, wives, and women, we are often running the show. Everyone is looking to you for all the answers, planning, and coordinating. Don’t allow things to not get done, because of lack of organization. If you have to, compartmentalize and categorize. Section everything out into its own individual categories, rank them in order of importance, and then tackle them.
7. Breathe. Know that tomorrow’s a new day and that you can start fresh. As long as its not life or death, its okay for some things to roll over to the next. Take a deep breath, give your brain a boost of oxygen and get some rest. You’ll sleep better and feel better when you get started on things the next morning.
I hope these tips are helpful to you. No, I don’t do them all myself everyday, but I try to remember to do one or two when I feel the pressure’s on. All in all, when you feel overwhelmed and pressure, go to your happy place. Do what you have to do to get there, because you will be a better you for you and everyone else!
xxoo,
