The Reality of Growing a Business While Raising Littles: A True Inside Look at Motherhood & Entrepreneurship

The Reality of Growing a Business While Raising Littles: A True Inside Look at Motherhood & Entrepreneurship

The Reality of Growing a Business While Raising Littles: A True Inside Look at Motherhood & Entrepreneurship | BlissandFaith.com

For me, content creation is the bee’s knees…like for real. Unfortunately, I have way more ideas than time to execute them. This also plays into my creating products (or lack there-of) that I have no doubt will valuably serve my community, and coming up with services to offer based off my experience in content creation and business strategy. I’ll be honest, it sucks, but I know at the end of the day the season I’m in won’t last forever.

This season, if you will, the one where I’m a mom to two very young littles, that require my attention and vigilance from pretty much sun up to sun down. When I transitioned from a mom of one to one of two, this hit me like a mack truck. It wasn’t just the fact that I now had my time split between two children, but two children with very different personalities and needs.

A Tale of Two Realities

See the thing is when my son was born it was him and I all day, every day while my husband went to work and at the time had a traditional 9-5 schedule. It was gravy, but I didn’t know it or appreciate it, to be honest, at the time. It was a simpler time, an easier time, a happier…but also hard time, too. It was hard because I was learning how to be a mom, a stay-at-home mom at that who had just left the military, so yeah, needless to say, my life was a complete 180 from the moment my son pretty much came out of the womb.

Looking back, it was a lot to go through, but nothing compared to today. My husband’s schedule is demanding, on him, me, and our family in general. We’ve another little to the family, which has been a wonderful addition and the hugest blessing, but she (my daughter) is a force to be reckoned with. When she entered our family, she changed the entire dynamic of it for the best, but she personally changed my dynamic as a woman who aspires to own her own business and work and live in a life that she truly loves and is fulfilled in addition to being a wife and mom.

Challenges are inevitable

My daughter’s arrival brought a whole new set of challenges to me getting my business to a place in which I could supplement my family’s income, and still work inside the home and be available to care for my children full-time. This is crucial for me, because my husband works outside the home in a high-risk job, with long hours. It’s beyond important for me (and him) to have a stable and fully available parent in the home to care for our children.

When I found out I was pregnant with my daughter, my son was just a few months over a year, and he was the most chill kid ever. I could hang out with him, do all my mom duties, put him down for nap, work and go back to mom duties when he woke up. At bedtime, he was always down a good hour or so before my daughter goes down these days, so I could go back to working.

Back then, I was blogging, running an Etsy shop, and freelancing. I was also active on social media and took advantage of in-person networking opportunities like events and conferences — allowing me to connect with other creatives both local and afar.

It’s so funny because I thought with one baby that I had sooo much to juggle. Insert laughing emoji here. I’ll tell you, juggling two, and many times by myself is no comparison to handling the one. The funny thing is that I never thought about this when I was pregnant with my daughter because I guess I thought I’d be able to go about growing my business and community the same way, with the same momentum that I’d been doing all along. What a shocker it was when I had her and my motivation to do anything blog or business related dropped off the map — and for like close to a year, people.

Checked-Out & Too Much of A Good Thing is Bad

As bad I wanted to be tuned into all things online, I was completely checked out. Like I could have cared less about blogging, and even more so about social media. I was like Twitter who? Instagram what? and, Facebook, huh? 

During this time, the one thing I did was consume a large amount of content and that wasn’t necessarily a good thing. You can read all about that in this post or listen to this podcast episode. Basically, while it’s important to consume content; take courses, attend trainings, etc., it’s also important to have a balance in doing so. You need to actually implement the training that your intaking, and for a myriad of reasons.

The main reason being that you need to actually see if it works for you and your business, or whatever your endeavors are in consuming the content in the first place.

I take it that you, like me, consume this type of educational/informative content for the sake of learning and applying it to your business in order to grow it; all while building authority and being profitable.

Helping, Serving, & Compensation

Let’s face it, as much as we all want to help and serve others, those of us who choose to do it in the form of running a business need to generate an income and profit in doing so because otherwise, you just have a hobby. I’m a strong believer that there is nothing with being paid to share your knowledge and expertise because isn’t that what we do in a “traditional” job — and no one gets self-righteous about that when there’s a corporation backing that paychecks, benefits and all.

As I digress, in being business owners we have to ensure that we’re applying what we learn when we consume information.

Otherwise, overwhelm and confusion will soon ensue and it becomes more and more difficult to implement and test new concepts and theories. This is what happened to me. By the time I got my mojo in my business, I had a thousand ideas running through my head and no direction on how and which one’s to implement. Yet another set back in my business growth because again I was stagnated by not only internal factors but outside ones as well.

Honesty & Loss of Passion

I will be honest and say that a lot of my consuming so much content was that I was thirsty, I couldn’t get enough of it, but the other side of that truth is that it was easier to consume than to create it. The last thing a sleep deprived, tired mama wants to do when she finally gets her kids down for a nap (and unicorn moment: at the same time) or off to bed at night is sit up for another 2 or 3 hours and work on content.

Between dishes, laundry, and actually needing some time to decompress, content creation was the last thing on my mind. I even found myself agitated by random Etsy order that came in from my shop, because I had zero passion to fill them. Don’t even get me started with any customer services issues that may have arised. I just didn’t have it in me, I was out of steam, passion, and time, too.

Balance Is a Unicorn…I’m Convinced

As a mama trying to balance it all and keep the passion alive for growing a business, it’s been very hard over the past year. I get a little more focused every day, but I’m definitely still in the thick of things and figuring out how to navigate motherhood and growing a business.

My wife and mom duties always come first, but how will I grow my business to a place where it can support my family if I can’t prioritize it high enough to really start making things happen. This is the real question of the day, and one I don’t have the answer to. I don’t have it all together and I’m not sure I ever will. Some days I get a huge burst of clarity and motivation in regards to growing and running a business, and other days I find myself completely removed from the whole process.

I know there’s a way because I see other women doing it, but I don’t know how. Everyone has different circumstances; some have more help from their spouses, support from family and friends, or teams that they can delegate to. No two business owners lives or operations look identical, which is why I know the only way I can find my way is to go through it and grow through it.

There is no magical pill or formula to take or implement — it’s simply life and no one can live it for us.

I know that one day, I’ll look back and it’ll all make sense; the mess, the confusion, the hard moments will all result in something beautiful that will make the moment I strive to get to as a business owner that much sweeter. I believe that with every bone in my body because I’ve experienced this exact emotion in giving birth. The pregnancy, all of the aches, pains, and discomfort make that moment of laying your eyes on your new, precious baby for the first time so sweet, like to your core.

My business in many ways in like another child, just not a physical one that I have to chase around, but it is one that I have to feed, i.e. time and money. That sweetness that I can nearly taste is one of the many reasons that keeps me going. It’s that and really wanting to create a life that I truly love in being my own boss, and running a business that will serve others valuably and sincerely.

So if anything, that’s my answer, at least the only one I have right now to navigating this thing called motherhood, and this thing called entrepreneurship.

Recent Milestones

Recent Milestones

Disclosure:  The VTech product, information, and giveaway have been provided by VTech.  All opinions and statements made by me are my own.

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I can’t tell you how long its been since I shared an update about Chunk with you all.  He’s growing so fast everyday and I think on some level I pulled back from sharing to cherish the moments that are going by so fast.  Its crazy how everyday he’s doing something new and amazing.  Its so sad that as humans we don’t get to remember these moments ourselves when we’re little, because, most people don’t start forming memories until about age 3 or 4.

It would be so awesome to remember all of the moments of growth and development, but I guess with everything else that happens throughout our lifetimes, God makes room in our brains for me formable memories, so to say.  I take it that’s what parents are for, outside of the obvious of course!  They’re the ones that keep track, record, and remember all of our milestones, and thank goodness for that!  I’m doing my best with Chunk, but I will tell you that its hard sometimes, because it feels like I blink and he’s doing something new.  So, here’s a little rundown of all of the “new” things he’s been doing lately:

  • Crawling – 6 1/2-7 months
  • Sleeping through the night – 7 months
  • Cruising – 8 months
  • Walking – 11 months
  • Eating solids– 9-10 months
  • Birthday (cue the confetti) – Turned 1 year old in October!
  • Waves “Hi” and points – 11-12 months
  • Says Da-da/Ma-ma – 7-8 mos for Da-da, 12-13 mos for Ma-ma
  • Running – 13 months
  • First Tantrum – 12 months
  • Teething – 5 month – currently.  He has 8 teeth right now, with the molars on the way!

So much in just 6-7 months, right?  Yes…and he’s rolling up on 14 months next week.  The major changes have been physical and emotional, so I’m betting the mental development is up next.  Chunk is becoming more verbal everyday, trying to hard to talk.  I believe that’s the source of much of many of his tantrums.  He can be temperamental at times, but I also think that’s due to his strong will, aggressive personality, and independent nature.  The main thing I focusing on now is sensory and language, because they are the skills that he will use most as he grows over the next few years, and throughout life.

The VTech Expert Panel was kind enough to send us a few toys to aid in Chunk’s meeting of milestones, because babies/toddlers learn through play. I’m so thankful, because they came just in time for the holidays and will be under the tree, ready for him to tear into Christmas morning.  Here’s what he’ll be playing with throughout the year as he learns and grows:

vtech1Lil’ Critters Play & Dream Musical Piano™
(Ages 0-12 months; MSRP $24.99)

  • Learn and play music with animal friends! The Lil’ Critters Play & Dream Musical Piano by VTech has a variety of fun musical activities that engage your child on the floor or attached to the crib.
  • This soft piano features five animal piano keys that introduce music, instruments and animals.
  • The piano also includes a light-up sun that shines and flashes to the music to attract your baby’s attention.
  • Choose from two modes of play for fun learning and music activities.

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Roll & Surprise Animal Train™
(Ages 6-36 months; MSRP: $15.99)

  • Your little one will enjoy peek-a-boo fun and develop fine motor skills through turn, slide and press activities.
  • Animal friends introduce animal names, animal sounds and colors.
  • This educational toy also rewards curiosity and teaches cause and effect with pop-up surprises and 55 songs, melodies, sounds, and phrases.

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Chomp & Count Dino™
(Ages 12-36 months; MSRP: $19.99)

  • Simply place one of the eight brightly-colored play pieces in the dino’s mouth and watch as he eats and recognizes each piece.
  • Play in either food or counting mode and the dino responds with rewarding sounds and phrases all while introducing colors, numbers, shapes and more.
  • Press the question button and kids can answer the dino’s questions to show what they’ve learned.
  • Five shape buttons help kids learn shapes and numbers, while spinning the disc on the dino’s back will play sing-along songs.
  • The dino can also be pushed or pulled by a string for even more fun melodies.

I feel that Chunk will really enjoy all three of these toys, because he’ll be able to learn different things from each of them.  He loves pressing buttons, rolling things around (including his current favorite toy, a model battery operated automated Dodge Viper), and in general exploring things.  I’m especially excited about the Chomp & Count Dino™, because that one’s right at his age group and he won’t grow out of it for a few more years, plus it has a lot of sensory and teaching capabilities, so that’ll be excellent for him!

Even more so, Vtech was kind enough so send along some wonderful insight from their Expert Panel and Milestones that I’d love to share with you all. Here’s a bit more background about who they are and what they do:

  • The Expert Panel is compiled of six experts including, Dr. Lise Eliot, Early Childhood Mental Development Expert, who collaborated with VTech to develop the Milestones resource.
  • The milestones are broken down by ages that range from newborn to nine years old.
  • Each age range is broken down by three categories of learning:
    • Language and Cognitive
    • Social and Emotional Development
    • Physical and Motor
  • The categories explain different characteristics and developments that your child is faced with at a specified age and is then followed by recommended products that best cater to your child.

Dr. Lise Eliot, Early Childhood Mental Development Expert, responded to developmental/ Milestones questions from fellow bloggers.  – How exciting!

Q. As a parent, what are your suggestions on things I can do with my child to help them develop their social and emotional skills? What are ways I can help my child to get the most of their playtime?

A. Social-emotional skills are the bedrock of learning, so good for you for taking an interest in cultivating them in your child. The best way to promote emotional and interpersonal skills is through interaction–reading, singing and lots of talking with your child. Make eye contact with him or her. Laugh together. Direct your child’s attention to interesting things in your environment. When you read together, ask your child questions about the characters’ thoughts and feelings. This can help build empathy. Another way to think about it is to use books or videos as a stepping stone for dialogue with your child. It’s the two-way, back-and-forth sharing of words and feelings that build emotional and communication skills. Playtime has ample opportunity to do this, whether you are visiting the zoo, finger-painting, or playing with toys. Take every opportunity to talk about the feelings and relationships among characters your child is drawing or playing with.

Q. As a stay-at-home mom, I feel like I’m responsible for most of my toddler’s learning the first couple of years. How can I ensure that I’m teaching him all he needs to know? What are the best games or play to help him learn basics things like numbers, colors, words, etc.?

A. Children learn through play, so almost any activity is a learning opportunity for your child. Show your child how to count banana slices at lunch time, or toothbrush strokes at bedtime. Read ABC books to him to teach letter sounds and recognition. But don’t worry too much about academic skills in younger children. Most important at this age is for children to learn the joy of discovery. Try to avoid drilling exercises (like flashcards) and instead focus on learning about the real world around him–animals, people, vehicles, music, art–whatever you encounter through books or the world outside that excites your child. When kids find a passion and get absorbed in it, early literacy and number skills follow easily.

Q. What if it seems like your child isn’t reaching a particular milestone, what can you do to facilitate the learning of it? While every child is different, are there any Milestones (when not achieved on schedule) a parent should be concerned about?

A. It’s important for parents to know what milestones to expect, because failure to reach them can be a warning sign of a developmental delay. For social skills, we like to see babies making eye contact early on, and worry if it doesn’t happen by 3 months or age, or if s/he is not sharing facial expressions or some other kind of back-and-forth communication by 9 months. For language skills, we worry when children are saying no words by 16 months, or only a few words at 2 years, and when there is any loss of communication ability at any age. For motor skills, it is concerning if a baby cannot bring an object to his or her mouth by 7 months, sit independently by 10 months, or walk by 18 months. If your child isn’t reaching these milestones, talk to your pediatrician, who may propose additional testing and exercises you can do with your child at home to promote his or her development.

Q. My 2 year old (26 months to be exact) barely talks unless she wants to. She has two older siblings who tend to speak for her. She can string a few words together like “me up” or “love you.” How can we encourage her to talk more and what VTech products would be most beneficial for her?

A. There’s a simple equation to verbal development: “Language in = Language out” The more words you and others address to your child, the larger her own vocabulary will eventually be. You are right that younger children sometimes do have trouble getting a word in edgewise in a big family. Find opportunities when your daughter can be the only one speaking. Try to carve out some one-on-one time, when you are just focused on each other, and make sure to listen and respond to every word or babble she makes, acting as if you understand her. Imitate her words and sounds and offer lots of praise. Just giving your child the confidence that she is being heard will provide great reinforcement to encourage her to speak more.
Also, VTech’s infant toys can promote this language development since most produce simple words or phrases that babies love to control. Toys such as Cody The Smart Cub™ and Cora The Smart Cub™ introduce children to first words, emotions, stories, sing-alongs, and more.

Q. How do doctors come up with specific milestones for each age group? What are some milestones for older age groups (up to age 9)?

A. Infant developmental milestones have been cataloged by studying thousands of babies from all walks of life. In healthy children, the various milestones emerge in a predictable sequence and time, give or take a few weeks or months. This predictable pattern is due to the maturation sequence of the developing brain, along with the typical sequence of practice most babies engage in, given their gradually growing strength and coordination. Some milestones you can look for as your child gets older include: able to draw a circle at age 3, asking lots of “Why” questions at age 4, knowing his or her letters at age 5, tying shoes at age 6, reading aloud fluently at age 7, and a big spurt of social independence beginning at 8-9 .

Q. What are some of the benefits of teaching children sign language at a young age to help improved their cognitive, motor and social skills? How can teaching sign language to my child help promote more than language development? How can sign language help stimulate a child’s brain in other ways?

A. The research on sign language is not terribly strong, but enough has been done to indicate that sign language may benefit your child’s overall language development. The more words addressed to babies, whether spoken or gestured, the faster their own vocabulary growth. Sign language also has the advantage that it is easier for babies to communicate using simple gestures, compared to oral articulation. So especially in the first year of life, some babies find it easier to communicate their needs when taught simple signs, and may express less frustration than infants who were not exposed to baby signing.

You can check out this video that features Dr. Eliot providing an introduction to Milestones.

Dr. Lise Eliot, Early Childhood Mental Development Expert Bio:

Dr. Lise Eliot is Associate Professor of Neuroscience at The Chicago Medical School of Rosalind Franklin University of Medicine & Science. A Chicago native, she received an A.B. degree from Harvard University, a Ph.D. from Columbia University, and did post-doctoral research at Baylor College of Medicine in Houston. In addition to more than 50 published peer-reviewed journal articles and magazine pieces on children’s brain and mental development, Dr. Eliot has authored two books.

Visit VTech on Twitter & Facebook to connect with experts, other parents, and stay in the know about the latest Milestone product!

Here’s to our kids meeting milestones, and growing and learning more and more every day!

Are there any major (or minor) milestones that your little ones have meant lately?  How are you fostering them in doing, as well as keeping track? – Hopefully you’re keeping up better than me!

Additionally, if you’re interested in receiving a gift pack from VTech, send me an email directly at perfecttenns [at] gmail [dot] com.  I’d love for you to be able to share your child’s milestones with me and rest of your readership, and how VTech possibly played a role in them!

Pros & Cons of Roomsharing and Co-Sleeping/Bed-Sharing

Pros & Cons of Roomsharing and Co-Sleeping/Bed-Sharing

As you all may know I recently wrote a post on sleep training and how I was struggling with my son’s 4-month sleep regression.  I promise I have part 2 coming up, but it appears as soon as I thought we were past the regression, its still rearing its ugly head.  However, I wanted to take a moment to discuss roomsharing and co-sleeping/bed-sharing, because those are two of the things we’ve been doing to cope with the sleep regression. Although many do both of these, or even one or the other by choice, we are not.  Well at least the bed-sharing part.  Nonetheless, its what works for us for the time being, and it allows us to get some sleep. Continue reading “Pros & Cons of Roomsharing and Co-Sleeping/Bed-Sharing”